Every day millions of people use public bathrooms. There are strange interactions that happen at public toilets that leave us shaking our heads or laughing hysterically. Sometimes we’re confused about what occurred. Other times we’re disgusted.
We tend to forget about these toilet interactions quickly. After all nobody wants to talk at the dinner table about their experiences in the park bathroom.
Have you grown up with the saying “look them in the eye”? Have you played footsies under the table before? I know I’ve spent time standing in line chatting with strangers.
These things are a part of American culture but you may way to think twice before doing them in the public restroom. A harmless chat won’t usually create a problem but your best bet is to focus on the task at hand! Get in, and get out without picking up any bacteria.
In this article we’ll discuss things that happen at public toilets and how to respond. Oblivious types do well in public toilets because they aren’t thinking about what could or couldn’t happen (as they say, ignorance is bliss).
People who are very aware of their surroundings, like former military, will likely be running through the various scenarios that may unfold in the public restroom. Going to use the toilet on high alert is great but can also increase tension. Stay relaxed – doing so will help prevent public peeing shyness (that so many people have these days).
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Eye Contact: Where To Look When At The Toilet
You walk into the restroom focused on finding a toilet and you make eye contact with a stranger. No big deal right?
You look away then for some reason you look back again and the person is still looking at you. Eye contact can happen a few different ways.
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Passing someone exiting the bathroom
Passing someone in the public bathroom is normal. You have to look at them so you don’t run into them and we’re taught to look people in the eye (you’ll want to look at them anyway in case you recognize an old friend).
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Eye contact in the mirror with someone washing their hands
Eye contact in the mirror is still pretty normal, people will look up from washing their hands to see who’s entered the restroom.
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Eye contact with someone using the urinal next to you
Eye contact with someone using the urinal next to you can get a little weird. There’s an unwritten rule about not looking at others when peeing.
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Caught in the middle of two friends using the urinal
Eye contact is this situation is awkward but usually manageable. When people are talking through you it’s not easy to figure out what to do.
So how do you address eye contact in the bathroom? Situations 1 and 2 are pretty normal, you shouldn’t look into them much and eye contact isn’t necessarily a bad thing – it’s natural. If there’s a wink or an obvious smile then things may be getting weird.
Too much eye contact while actually going the bathroom (urinating) could get uncomfortable. As the case with most eye contact, looking away usually solves the problem.
What if that sixth sense is telling you the individual is still looking at you, then what? Our best advice is to look at the wall or the urinal.
While doing so you can mentally assess if the look is out of affection, curiosity, or intimidation. Putting your tough guy/gal face on and wearing a frown could help the situation and make you appear less friendly.
If your prefer the direct approach, turn to look at them and say in your tough voice “hey what’s up” or “you ok”. This should break the silence and you let the person know that you’re aware of their gaze.
The last situation is more awkward than anything. Eye contact will probably occur because you’ll be confused if the people next to you are talking to you.
You might make eye contact with both of them, then if you’re quick, you’ll act fast and look at the wall or down. It can be tempting to jump into the conversation like you’re one of the guys/gals but just stay out of it – when in doubt avoid convo in the bathroom.
Someone Tapping Their Foot Under Your Toilet Stall
This situation hasn’t happened to most people but if it’s happened you won’t forget it. Supposedly this is a signal for someone looking for love. If you’re not aware of this you’d likely react in a number of ways:
- Move your feet away from the intruding foot tapper
- Say something like “hey, you need some toilet paper”
- Stomp on that foot like a cockroach because it crossed into your territory
- Unperturbed, you evaluate the brand of shoe the tapper is wearing and estimate the cost of that fine shoe
- Pee on his foot
- Try to understand why the guy/gal needs such a wide pooping stance
- Look around your stall to see if he/she is trying to retrieve a dropped item
- Strike up a conversation “did you tap when you were younger, great form”.
The cockroach stomp is a great way to discourage the foot tapper but not everyone is so aggressive. The thoughtful person would look around to make sure nothing was lost on under the stall door.
But there’s really no proper way to respond. If you’re aware of the street code you might be scared and forget to wipe (and flush) on your way out of the stall. If you’re feeling frisky you might play footsies. Your call!
Standing In Line For The Toilet
Standing in line to use the toilet is the worst. Women have it much worse but both sexes are screwed if they’re at an old stadium (most new stadiums have plenty of toilets) or old concert hall.
If you do have to stand in line make sure you’re in the correct one.
- If you just need to piss, don’t take up a stall because there are people who really need that stall. A dump deserves more immediate access than a piss.
- Are you a socially nervous pisser? When there are lines you aren’t allowed to have a stall when it’s busy – use the darn urinal.
Is it cool to talk to others when in line for the urinal? Well, you’re in luck. This is the one time to chat it up when waiting in line. We’re in it together so chatting can be a bonding experience (even better when at a game and everyone’s rooting for the home team).
Lastly, make sure you know where the line is formed and stay in it. There’s a lot of confusion around restroom lines because sometimes they go out the door.
Remember there are likely two lines (dumps and pee) so don’t stand in line for the urinal is you got to drop one.
Peeing In Toilet Stall When Urinal Is Open
We referred to the nervous peeer above. They always choose to use a stall because they don’t have to worry about others looking at them. It’s much less pressure and they have privacy.
If you’re a nervous peeer don’t worry, there are thousands of people suffering fro this disease. Nervous peeers aren’t usually a problem.
They create space in a bathroom and everyone likes their space. The problem occurs when the bathroom is crowded and they take up precious space in a stall when they could using the urinal.
If you hear a guy peeing in the stall and it’s busy feel free to remind the bloke that he could have used the urine for that – before you do it be sure he isn’t bigger or meaner than you.
Person At Neighboring Urinal/Stall Starts A Conversation
There’s a time and a place for conversation and at the toilet isn’t the best place. Standing in line for the toilet is a perfect time for convo, but once you approach the pisser it’s time for introspection and concentration.
If someone rolls up next to you and starts asking you questions there’s a good chance they will throw off your rhythm.
If you’re the politician type you’ll probably enjoy the convo and may opt to play swords with the guy but for most people talking while doing the deed is taboo. Stick to the task at hand!
If someone does start chatting with you, be polite but let them know where you stand. A simple head-nod or half smile will get the point across.
Know that if you reciprocate your output may suffer. People who are drunk tend to not be affected by toilet conversation nor do they adhere to traditional boundaries. Engage at your own risk.
Conclusion
There are all kinds of interesting things that happen at a public toilet. We didn’t even get to wall art. We did discuss the most common interactions that people have with one another. This includes eye contact, chatting, foot tapping, standing in line, and the token antisocial peeer.
In reality there’s no correct way to approach any toilet interaction. Societal norms are important in these scenarios.
A tourist from Japan might find it totally acceptable to drop his pants to his ankles at the urinal. A Norwegian man might think the public restrooms are perfect for competitive distance peeing.
Do your part to make sure the restroom doesn’t get too weird. We suggest:
- Limiting toilet convo to lines only
- No eye contact while doing the deed and nothing longer than a second
- Peeing in stall only when there are few patrons
- Absolutely no foot tapping
If you’ve encountered other unusual toilet behaviors that we missed feel free to let us know in the comments below. As usual, thanks for stopping by and reading another Toilet Travels article. We cover all topics about the toilet. Remember, if it’s yellow let it mellow, if it’s brown flush it down!